Lately I've been singing out loud while walking Buddy. Not the whole time. And not very loudly. And sometimes I whistle instead. But I never used to do that--sing out loud while walking the dog.
Maybe I'm doing it now because there are less people around, especially in the mornings. But I also sometimes do it a little during our 2nd walk of the day, when more people are out and about.
This morning it was the Inspector Gadget theme song, thanks to watching a YouTube video last night full of 80's cartoon theme songs.
Yesterday it was Back in the Day (Puff) by Erykah Badu. And I think it came to mind because the day before I charged up an old, retired, phone to listen to some music I hadn't heard in a long time. I don't recall this song playing, but it did have a bunch of Erykah Badu in it.
And "Back in the day when things were cool," does go through my head from time to time anyway. And this seems like an appropriate time for those words, considering how things have changed...
Even though I'm doing really well through this pandemic and the stay at home order, and my life actually hasn't changed all that much, thing have changed. Some changes are not so cool. But, to be quite honest, some changes are. I mean, I get to do my favorite thing--teach Sheng Zhen-- 5 days a week from the comfort of my living room AND I can reach more people that way (people who couldn't attend in person classes because of schedule or location).
Nevertheless, "Back in the day when things were cool" goes through my head, and yesterday I was singing it out loud during our morning walk.
I'd alternate between that and... get ready for this... this may shock some of you, but... "The Spirit of God is upon me. Whoa oh oh! The Spirit of God is upon me." I hadn't even heard this song since January or maybe February--whenever it was played in the Inward Journey class I'm taking at the Center for Spiritual Living.
And, yes, someday I will be sharing more about my evolving relationship with the word (and concept) of "God", a word that used to make me feel uncomfortable, a word I used to avoid but now sometimes sing out loud as I walk down the street. But that's not what this blog post is about. So, back to the songs I sing...
The day before yesterday, it was a song I must've heard on the radio last time I drove my car--almost 2 weeks ago. Not sure how else Doobie Ashtray got into my head, even though "back in the day" I used to listen to it a lot. And as I said in the Curiosity Walk, I don't even remember the last time I smoked, so it's weird that these weed-related songs are going through my head. Maybe it's nostalgia? I have been looking at old photos and talking to long-time friends a lot...
So the day before yesterday, and the day before that, I'm walking around singing, "Whatcha gonna do when you're all alone And you wanna smoke weed But the reefer's all gone? Don't front." Actually, it's "What you gonna do when the people go home" but i've been singing it as "whatcha gonna do when you're all alone" since, you know... social distancing and being all alone (other than Buddy).
And maybe that's one reason for the singing out loud--keeping myself company. Being playful with myself. Soothing myself. Entertaining myself. Uplifting myself... and possibly anyone who happens to hear me.
The singing out loud started longer ago than just a few days ago. But that's tied into the story of the "G" word, so I'll save that for another time.
In the meantime, when was the last time you sang out loud while doing something like walking down the street? Or do you miss singing in your car while commuting? Maybe it's time to go for a drive, even if just to sing.
Life is short. So, cut the bullshit.
Life is short. So, who really cares?
Life is short. So, live it to the fullest!
Life is short. So, why bother?
Life is short. So, tell them you love them...
You can spin it either way, this life is short thing. It can free you up or bring you down. It can make you an asshole or make you a saint. The choice is yours. It always is...
Life is short. And sometimes it's even shorter than we anticipate. You or someone you love could get diagnosed with a terminal illness, suddenly drop dead from something like an aneurysm, or get hit by a bus. Death can come at any time, to anyone, unexpectedly.
So? So, let's get clear on what matters most. Let's get clear on how we want to live, how we want to treat others. Let's be real. Let's be brave. Let's tell it like it is, with kindness and respect. Let's not hesitate. Because life is short, and you never know when you've had your last chance to be kind, to be honest, to love, to connect, to clear the air, to heal, to inspire, to liberate, to make a difference no matter how big or how small.
Life is short. Although, some say it's eternal. But so what if we continue on? That can be helpful in some contexts, but... This life, this life right now, here and now, this life is short--even shorter, in the grand scheme of things, if you believe we continue on. This incarnation, this body you're in now, this person you are today, how do you want to show up in the world? Who do you want to be? How do you want to be remembered?
Life is short, so cut the bullshit. Cut it all out. Clean it all up. Strive for greatness while loving and accepting yourself along the way. Be honest and expressive. Say what you mean. Mean what you say. Otherwise, what is the point? Just putting on some sort of fictional play?
Ugh, I feel tempted to apologize. And yet I know I don't need to. But I'm feeling annoyed, and I rarely write publicly when feeling this way. It's just that I'm writing this after learning this week that two men I went to high school with passed away. I didn't know them well, but I feel the impact of the loss. I feel the grief of their loved ones. My heart goes out to them. And I've also been feeling fed up with bullshit this week--other people's and my own. I'm just done. No more. Bullshit be gone!
What if it were that easy? To just wave a magic wand? Maybe it is. But maybe it takes waving it more than once. I suppose it depends on how much bullshit there is. But why not just abracadabra and poof that shit away once or twice a day, or however often it takes? Might as well try some creative visualization and get playful with it, because, yep, you guessed it: life is short.
I've been doing a lot of mental detoxing lately. And I'll be sharing more about what that means and how to do that in my new book, Detox Your Life. Speaking of which, one of the thought patterns I've been clearing is around urgency, such as letting go of rushing the editing process of that book in order to publish before the end of the year! So, it'll probably be available in 2020 instead of 2019. ;)
But I digress...
Not caring. That's what I want to write about today.
I was reminded the other day of "not caring" while in the process of cleaning up and clearing out toxic beliefs and self-limiting, self-defeating thoughts. I've been using several methods for this mental detox, and one is what I call "positive brainwashing."
Yes, brainwashing can be good for you! ;) Not all brainwashing is bad. Sometimes our brains need to be washed! I mean, really, think about all the junk that we take in both consciously and unconsciously each day. Don't you think it makes sense to clear that stuff away and scrub your mind clean at least every once in a while if not each and every day? I sure do!
Again, I'll share more about that in my book, and probably over time in blogs and articles as well. But right now this concept of "not caring" is on my mind because it's been working magic lately, and I owe it all to Abraham Hicks videos on YouTube--one of my favorite positive brainwashing tools.
Now, as a very caring, thoughtful, considerate person, the first time I heard encouragement to "not care" and even to recite "I don't care" like a mantra, I was amused by the relief I felt when getting into the mindset of "I don't care, I don't care, I don't care." Wow, what freedom! I realized what an energy drain caring too much--or about the wrong things--is. So I love being reminded to not care so much--and in some cases, to not care at all.
The truth is, it feels good to care less. When I care too much and try too hard, it's just exhausting and usually sabotages things. So now I'm embracing the power of not caring.
Now, this doesn't mean I am no longer a caring person. It doesn't mean I don't feel caring. It just means I'm lightening up around how I think about things. And I'm getting out of my own way.
I'm being more selective about what I do care about. I'm getting better at not caring about things that I can't control or that pull me out of alignment.
This "not caring" helps with letting go of attachments to outcome or to how things unfold. I'm getting better at letting go of some of the ways in which I think things need to be. I'm seeing so clearly how all of that over-caring, which is also a form of overthinking, is a protective mechanism. And I don't need that anymore. I can relax into trust, into faith; I can have more fun in this dance of life; I can feel more truly free.
Perhaps context matters here or would be helpful? So, here's an example. If I don't care what you think of this blog entry, I'm much more likely to let the words flow freely through me, not overthink it, and then release it into the world after just a little editing. This blog becomes a place where I can freely express myself without being a perfectionist. And that feels good. And feeling good is important. It's all anyone really wants. Although there are various flavors of feeling good, it all boils down to feeling good, right? Right.
And when I don't care what others think, I can still be mindful and respectful and kind, but I'm much more free to say and do as I please. I'm less inhibited, more authentic. I'm not walking on eggshells or trying to control things. I'm more in the now. I'm more accepting and trusting. I'm more free to be unapologetically me. And there is so much power in that.
When I care less, and don't try too hard, when I lean back and trust that everything truly is working out for me--and always has been working out for me--then things just fall into place with much more ease, flow, and grace.
And, so, I invite you to try on this whole "I don't care" thing. See how it goes for you. Or don't! I don't care. ;)
I don't care if you take my suggestion... but I do care about you.
I do care about feeling good and about you feeling good. I want you to be happy and to live your best life. I just don't care what path you take to get there but do hope you find a path that resonates, that serves you well. And so I'll wrap this up now and leave you with a link to a video all about caring and not caring.
Click here* if you're curious.
*If you've never listened to Abraham Hicks before, and/or don't resonate with the use of the word "source," you can replace it with something like god, higher self, higher power, love, the universe, inner knowing, inner wisdom, etc... Whatever floats your boat.
Rebecca Clio Gould is a Certified Sheng Zhen Teacher and Holistic Wellness Coach. Her specialties include self-love, embodied joy, women's sexuality, spirituality, surgery preparation, and trauma recovery. She is also a Supreme Science Qigong Instructor, Essence vs Form Coach, and Award-winning Author of "The Multi-Orgasmic Diet: Embrace Your Sexual Energy and Awaken Your Senses for a Healthier, Happier, Sexier You."